Friday Nights with Eden

Ever since I became a mother of two, I have lamented over how there is never quite enough of me to go around. Someone always seems to have to wait, or share their time. I know this is simply a part of being in a family, and that the benefits of having a sister far outweigh this negative, for both girls. But still. It is frustrating. For all of us, at one time or another.

I've always felt especially bad about what Eden misses out on. I know some parents obsess over how the older sibling has to sacrifice the one-on-one relationship with parents once a second comes along, and of course, I do care about that. But, even more, I think I have always felt that Sadie had 3+ years of having us to herself, and certainly that undiluted relationship had a profound impact on who she has become (for better or for worse, I suppose). And, I've always regretted that Eden could never have that same experience. Sure, she gets one-on-one time with either of us throughout the week, but there is a big difference between time alone with mom or dad and time alone with both mom and dad, if that makes sense.

Anyway, that was a pretty long preamble to say that as Sadie's social life is exploding, a really nice side effect is that Evan and I are getting to spend time as a party of three with Eden. And, it is wonderful - it really does remind me of our time with Sadie before Eden joined us. The past two Friday evenings, we've gone out as a threesome while Sadie was otherwise occupied (side note: when did Friday night become the new birthday party time?). Two weeks ago, we took her to Sawa for sushi - something we probably just would never do with two kids in tow. She loved the experience, and it was obvious, she loved the undivided attention. Last Friday, we were a bit more mundane, and simply took her grocery shopping; again, it was an experience reminiscent of our time with just Sadie. We used to take her grocery shopping all the time - once we had two kids, it just became easier for one of us to go and one to stay home with the kids. Anyway, again, it was just a fun evening - we let her pick out out a few extra treats at the store and then came home and made sundaes.

I'm guessing that these opportunities will continue to increase, at least until Eden hits the age where she'll have plans and then it will be just Evan and me (hard to imagine!). I'm already looking forward to my next Friday Night with Eden (in two weeks) and planning something good.

This independence thing needs a little work.

This morning, moments before we were to leave the house, I sent Eden to her room to retrieve her shoes and put them on. She is all about doing everything "by MYSELF!" these days, and usually pitches a fit if you try to help her. So, putting on her shoes is one of the safe activities that I am more than happy to let her tackle herself, even if it means it takes a lot longer.

Well, she's in her room for several minutes, when finally she calls out "Can you help me?" I walked into her room, fully expecting to see her working on the straps to her shoes. Nope. She was standing there, naked from the waist down, several baby wipes in her hand, and a poopy diaper strewn across the room. "I have poop all over my butt. Can you help me, please?" she asked, while I stood there, horrified and practically retching. 15 minutes later, she and the room were cleaned up, Evan was on his way to rent a steam cleaner, and we were finally on our way to daycare. Not the best start to the day.

I'm all for encouraging her independence (really, what choice do I have?), but I'm thinking it is either time to think about potty training, or time to start putting her back in onesies (to keep the diaper inaccessible).

I just love that little girl!

Today, Sadie spent the afternoon with her Grammy and Grampy, so Evan and I had the rare treat of an afternoon alone with Eden. I think that has happened maybe twice since I returned to work when she was 7 weeks old. It was delicious!

First, we went out to lunch - for sushi! I wish I'd taken a picture of my adorable child, sitting on a booster seat at the sushi bar, using her chopsticks (rubberbanded together) to eat her edamame. She seemed to realize that this was a special occaision, Sadie's absence. She was so...good, and quiet, and oh so different than she is when the four of us are out to eat. No clamoring for our attention or trying to get a word in edgewise while Sadie "motormouth" C. is chattering continuously. It was such a peaceful meal that it was kind of reminiscent of our childless days. I joked to Evan that before we had kids, when I thought about having one, this is what I thought it would be like - that the child would just seamlessly (and quietly) fit into the life we already had. We had a good laugh about that one!

Then, we came back to the house so she could nap. I took that opportunity to head out and do some holiday shopping (got a ton done, btw, and I'm feeling a bit less edgy about it now). After she woke up, she helped me create this funny on the computer and she was hysterical over it. Full on belly laughing. It was adorable.

We ended the afternoon by heading out to Evan's parents' house to have dinner with them and retrieve Sadie. As soon as they opened the door, Eden ran right over to Sadie and gave her the biggest, most heartfelt hug ever. There is nothing better than seeing my kids love on eachother. What a great day.

Someone order a truckload of...sand?

I just thought this photo was funny.

Random Cuteness

Just a few cute things that Eden is saying and doing now, that I'll want to remember:

She sings ALL the time. It is adorable. Her favorites are "Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star", "ABC's", "Happy Birthday to You" and "I Love You" (the Barney Song). I have to capture it on video, because she has the cutest, softest, little singing voice.

She says "Thank you, Mama" anytime I give her anything, or do anything for her (including wiping her nose and changing her diaper. Sometimes, she even says it through tears, if she doesn't really want me to be doing what I'm doing.

She has started saying her own name...but she puts the accent on the second syllable. So, it comes out eDEN. She does the same for Sadie (make that, saDEEEEE!). Evan jokes that she sounds Israeli.

She says things like "Whoopsie!", "Sorry", and "Oh my goodness" (though, she says doodness) appropriately. Again, the soft little voice saying such grown up things is too cute for words.

She noticed letters everywhere (signs, books, people's t-shirts) and calls them "AB's".

She freely gives out hugs and kisses to us, and just loves on her sister all the time, too.

She loves to sit and 'read' her books. She has a lot of them memorized, so it is a cute sight to walk past her room, see her sitting in her rocking chair and reading aloud.

An Eden Funny

Last night, I was singing Eden a little song before bed. It was a sweet, quiet moment for the two of us. "Wait, wait" she says, putting her tiny little finger to her mouth and "shushing" me. I stop singing, and look at her expectantly...what does my little one need to tell me? Is she finally going to say those three words I've been waiting to hear?

She farted. Loudly. And then laughed hysterically.

She may look nothing like Evan, but there's no doubting that girl's paternity.

Revelation

Sadie and Evan were both sick for most of the weekend, so I had a lot of alone time with Eden. And, I've come to a revelation. I've been thinking for a while that Eden is in a really active and difficult to parent phase, and that is why it has been hard to be with both of them. Because I've had the opportunity to do things alone with Sadie, and they've been really easy and pleasant, I've been blaming Eden for my overwhelmedness (is that a word) when the three of of us go anywhere ("it is just hard now because Eden is into everything...").

Spending the days with her alone at the beach was a pleasure. She is easy and happy and not difficult to manage at all. She can sit and amuse herself with the sand toys for ages. I'm realizing that each of them is at their best when they have me to themselves, and that what is hard and overwhelming for me is simply the act of parenting two children who are competing for my attention. I feel so bad that I've haven't been able to recognize that. I think that I've been so focused on making sure that Sadie doesn't feel 'displaced' by her little sister, that I haven't really tuned in to the fact that Eden needs my undivided attention, too.

I've been sending Eden to the sitter's house one day a week so that I can have a day alone with Sadie. I'm going to start figuring out how to fit in more one on one time with Eden, as well.

It really just dawned on me this morning

that Sadie only has nine more days of school before she graduates. I cannot wrap my head around this fact. She is going to be done with preschool. I'm not sure if she is totally ready, and I know I sure as heck am not. It does seem as though the years just keep flying by faster and faster.

It is really a neat thing to have two kids...because you can see forwards and backwards, in a way. Watching Sadie get to an age where we can really do fun things together, it makes me excited for the time when Eden will be old enough, too, and we can embark on the next phase in parenting. On the other hand, watching and treasuring Eden's babyness is wonderful, too, and something that I'm not sure I did enough of with Sadie (because I was always anxious about her getting to the 'next' stage).

Anyway, I do feel like graduating pre-school and starting Kindergarten is really the end of an era. I'm looking forward to a last summer with my 'not yet big enough for real school' kiddo before September rolls around and she makes that transition.

Babies are like onions....

My kid is weird. As I mentioned a few weeks ago, she's starting to have a word explosion. So, you would think she would be all about saying the basics...yes, no, doggie, kitty, eat, this, that...

Nope. She's following up her debut of the word "Cracker" (which comes out sounding like a cross between someone who is hearing-impaired and someone who just had oral surgery) with another goody:

SHREK.

*Shrug*

Word Explosion

After almost a week of being super cranky and giving us a hard time with going to sleep and waking too early in the morning (all of which I attributed to teething), Eden seems to have made a gigantic leap with regard to comprehension and articulation of words. She is now saying (or, attempting to say) tons of things, including "thank you", "good!" (this one in response to us asking her how her day was), "cracker", "night-night", and "diaper".

She is also pointing appropriately to objects when prompted (I have to say, I was suprised to realize that she can identify the majority of the Sesame Street crew.

And, in her cutest move of the day, last night I asked her if it was time for night-night. "NyNy!" she shouted and nodded emphatically, then wriggled out of my arms and toddled into her bedroom and returned carrying a pair of pajamas.

How fast they grow!