Efficient Parenting

On Sunday, we spent some time with friends of ours--S and L-- who have two little ones (almost three and just turned a year). It was quite an experience. They were so tense and stressed out the entire time. Evan and I were both struck by a few things about them and their parenting style. For one, they force those kids to conform to their lifestyle/schedule (they don't plan for naps, have no problem making plans to be somewhere at a time when one or both of them is likely to need to be napping) and the result is that the kids are miserable and crying and exhausted. I just don't understand why they do that to them and to themselves? I mean, I don't necessarily advocate being a slave to the nap schedule (although, I was when Sadie was an only), but it seems irresponsible and unfair to just not really consider that the kids have needs.

But, the big thing that we noticed was that S and L don't seem to have established any sort of method of effiency with their parenting tasks. I am not exaggerating when I say that from the time they arrived at our house, until we were actually sitting on the sand, it took almost an hour (we live 5 minutes from the beach). Rather than wait to change the kids into swimsuits and swim diapers once we got there, they decided to change them into their bathing suits at our house, then wait until we got to the beach to put them into their swim diapers. I couldn't understand why they would put them through the changing process twice.

Then, when it was time to go, it took over an hour from the time they started up to the locker/shower until they were ready to get in the car.

Ok, so since I go all the time with the girls, I have gotten a good routine down and can be off the beach, all of us showered and dressed and ready for the car in about 20 minutes, but still. Even without an established routine, there were just some obvious things they could have done to save time and energy. For instance...I don't understand why L had to shower each of the kids separately, then shower herself, while S more or less stood around waiting for his turn to shower. When I am alone with the girls, I take both of them in with me, dress myself, then dress them. When Evan joins us, I still take them both in with me, and then hand Eden out to him to dress while I attend to Sadie and get myself dressed. Makes sense, doesn't it?

I guess I'm probably just coming across as smug and judgemental, but really...I feel bad for them that they seem so wiped out and overwhelmed with parenting their kids. Seems like they could make some small changes that would make life easier/more pleasant for all of them. Oh, did I mention that they're planning to start on baby #3 this year? God help us all!